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Hooray for [insert something here].
Gee, what to talk about today. Well, today was a pretty shitty day. It wasn't the just-shoot-me-to-put-me-out-of-my-misery kind of day. It was more of the fuck-it-I-just-don't-care-anymore variety. You know the kind.
It started with a fun commute through traffic that was the result of people who can't figure out what to do with all of that open space in front of them on a highway. You know who you are. You are completely confused by the open space in front of you, combined with the 70mph sign. So, you go 25mph and try to see if you can elevate my blood pressure closer to Stephen Hawking's IQ. Thanks to you assholes, I rarely catch the shuttle to my office when I want to, and I often spend 13 minutes waiting to be whisked away to work by the bumpy shuttle.
A word about the shuttle: I work at a place where the management can afford to throw parties monthly for itself, but they won't pay a few dollars each month to let us park on the premises. Instead, we have to park a mile away (not exactly a mile, but it feels like 7 miles at 8am). Had they told me about the parking during my interview, I'd have probably taken a job someplace pleasant, like Beruit. So, now I can't leave during the day to do important things like go to the doctor, because my car is embargoed in a parking lot that has no lighting or security. Thanks.
Now, when someone quits or gets fired, I have mixed emotions. My first thoughts are as to whether or not the person in question has a parking space in the garage or surface lot. After all, that's what's important this time of year. That, and the quest to see who can erect the largest conifer in the Western World, to honor the "traditional" conifers that so obviously grow in the Sinai desert.
While I'm on the subject of Christmas, I should weigh in on the fact that old men wearing felt outfits asking children to sit on their laps and tell them what they want should not be considered normal when Michael Jackson is on trial for the very same thing. Maybe MJ just isn't old enough to escape trial.
I did have some rather good news today, though. Doctors have told me that another candidate for The Most Beautiful Baby In The World will be coming to these parts in May. In case you care, I will be having another daughter. And if you think I will love this one as much as the first one, you are correct.
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